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· Son of Tun
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Folks
Some people never cease to amaze me.
Over the last cpl weeks, many boxes have bean delivered to my house.
Seams everyone that should be kept "cooler" has been placed
on the back porch,,,,which is in the shade an much cooler,
while the others have been left on my regular entry area.
This by 2 different mail carriers........
I think bombing my carriers may be in order.....

:tape2:
 

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At least the UPS guy hides my boxes under a mat which blocks the sun at least. Not that it matters considering my cigars spend 5 days in transit in triple digit temps when I order from CI on a Mon morning. Now USPS is awesome. 3 days max when I get a package from Cbid who uses USPS shipping from the same state of PA.
 

· Banned
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My carrier calls me before dropping the "shipment" so I don't get KIA by the person I live with. This was set up some months ago in a covert operation called..."Don't Tease the Bulldog" and so far it has been working quite well. I get a call on my cellphone that tells me a dropoff is coming and I meet them at the top of the hill. We exchange materials ( my cigars and they get a Starbucks Coffee Card) and don't talk to each other except a little smile. I put the package in my car under the seat and drive back home and wait for another call after my order arrives from CBID, JR's, TampaHumidor,RockysCigars,Famous,CigarMonster,Joes Cigars, etc. etc. As in the immortal words of Hannibal Smith...I love it when a plan comes together.
 

· The Smoky Dawn Front
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My postal carrier is far far too incompetent for that kind of espionage.
 

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My postal carrier is far far too incompetent for that kind of espionage.
Lol...this is half the fun us retired folks have. What I don't like is when I get caught on the days my regular postal person isn't on duty and the relief person puts the "shipments" in the mailbox and the wife runs out there and grabs it....then comes back into the house yelling..."You got more cigars? You don't have enough with the 1000 cigars you already have upstairs?" blah blah blah blah....my ears are bleeding.
 

· Son of Tun
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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
Lol...this is half the fun us retired folks have. What I don't like is when I get caught on the days my regular postal person isn't on duty and the relief person puts the "shipments" in the mailbox and the wife runs out there and grabs it....then comes back into the house yelling..."You got more cigars? You don't have enough with the 1000 cigars you already have upstairs?" blah blah blah blah....my ears are bleeding.
sounds like out wives may be sisters...:tape2:
 

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Lol...this is half the fun us retired folks have. What I don't like is when I get caught on the days my regular postal person isn't on duty and the relief person puts the "shipments" in the mailbox and the wife runs out there and grabs it....then comes back into the house yelling..."You got more cigars? You don't have enough with the 1000 cigars you already have upstairs?" blah blah blah blah....my ears are bleeding.
Ha ha Im with you on that one. Luckily I get home 45min before my better half so I can open box put cigars in humi, dispose of package evidence, hide bank statement then hope she doesnt check online banking for a while. Then suggest she go shopping or go to the spa lol.
 

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Thank goodness you're among brother's Gary... I read a nice opportunity for blackmail... :pound:
Hahaha...don't think that hasn't crossed my mind and she pretty much knows I hide stuff like this and it's our little game we play. She has packages from Zappos and Chefs World and HSN..QVC coming in like mortars.

sounds like out wives may be sisters...:tape2:
We got some stories to tell have we not?

Ha ha Im with you on that one. Luckily I get home 45min before my better half so I can open box put cigars in humi, dispose of package evidence, hide bank statement then hope she doesnt check online banking for a while. Then suggest she go shopping or go to the spa lol.
How excited are you when hit home knowing that you only have a window of time to get things done...( The Home Version of The Hurt Locker ) and your mind racing with the excitement you may get caught if she gets home early...fingers racing getting the cigars out of the box, shredding statements/receipts...putting the box they came in under the plastic gargabe bags in the big trash container...your eyes wide like you just smoked a vile of crack..hands trembling talking to yourself...feet scurrying across the kitchen floor thinking about if you missed anything. On the big covert days I buy her slot of time at the spa up the street to do her nails, eyebrows,,,whatever trim job she needs. I work harder at this marriage than she ever gives me credit for. Can I get an amen?
 

· The Smoky Dawn Front
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Well, my wife likes to buy her shoes and handbags, so generally she won't say much (unless they're ISOMs which make her paranoid), as she realizes she doesn't need more shoes or purses anymore than I need more cigars.
 

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How excited are you when hit home knowing that you only have a window of time to get things done...( The Home Version of The Hurt Locker ) and your mind racing with the excitement you may get caught if she gets home early...fingers racing getting the cigars out of the box, shredding statements/receipts...putting the box they came in under the plastic gargabe bags in the big trash container...your eyes wide like you just smoked a vile of crack..hands trembling talking to yourself...feet scurrying across the kitchen floor thinking about if you missed anything. On the big covert days I buy her slot of time at the spa up the street to do her nails, eyebrows,,,whatever trim job she needs. I work harder at this marriage than she ever gives me credit for. Can I get an amen?
Amen brother you couldnt of hit it more spot on. Espcially about the crack head type speed I must move to complete the mission. I acutally put a tiny puncture in one of my cigars that came in a 5 pack with extra cello wrapping around it. I was cutting through it with a knife cause my bumbling nervous hands couldnt unwrap it. Luckily it didnt ruin said cigar which smoked just fine whith just a wee bit smoke escaping from the hole.

I did almost bust myself the other day by asking her to change the ice pack in my cooler which holds my humi due to my swamp cooler not being worth crap. I was at work and worried about the temp in there. She said wow your humi is looking rather full to which I smartly replied "yeah I havent been smoking much lately trying to get some age on em" whew close call!
 

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Amen brother you couldnt of hit it more spot on. Espcially about the crack head type speed I must move to complete the mission. I acutally put a tiny puncture in one of my cigars (for this reason alone is why I only use scissors) it with a knife cause my bumbling nervous hands couldnt unwrap it. Luckily it didnt ruin said cigar which smoked just fine whith just a wee bit smoke escaping from the hole.

I did almost bust myself the other day by asking her to change the ice pack in my cooler which holds my humi due to my swamp cooler not being worth crap. I was at work and worried about the temp in there. She said wow your humi is looking rather full to which I smartly replied "yeah I havent been smoking much lately trying to get some age on em" whew close call!
I have used up pretty much all those excuses and she just doesn't believe anything I have to say about cigars in general. I am greatful for not having to work or I'd be worrying about them all day...oh wait! Set up a small camera where you can check on the little ones anytime you want during the day when you are at work...is this over the top?:dunno:
 

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I have used up pretty much all those excuses and she just doesn't believe anything I have to say about cigars in general. I am greatful for not having to work or I'd be worrying about them all day...oh wait! Set up a small camera where you can check on the little ones anytime you want during the day when you are at work...is this over the top?:dunno:
Oh yeah siccors that would work lol. A camera would be a great idea assuming it was giving me a temp reading on my hygro and I could adjust an ac that actually worked remotely from my job. My swamp cooler wont get the house under 80. Luckily ice packs keep my guys right at 70.
 

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No esponage here on recieving day. What would be the point, she pays the VISA bill. After thirty years I know the wife will grumble a little but the she gets over it pretty quick.

I am lucky my UPS driver just lives three doors down so he hand delivers. If he wasn't a good Mormon I might even invite him over to have a smoke sometime.
 

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i wonder if my Postman hates me for all those packages he delivers to me every week.

At least the UPS guy hides my boxes under a mat which blocks the sun at least. Not that it matters considering my cigars spend 5 days in transit in triple digit temps when I order from CI on a Mon morning. Now USPS is awesome. 3 days max when I get a package from Cbid who uses USPS shipping from the same state of PA.
I also use USPS Priority . It comes in faster in 2 days for 7 bucks--- rather then 4 buck for UPS ground which is 5 days average .
 

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Wow I'm just the opposite, USPS in 5 days and UPS in 3.The UPS guy place my cigars under the deck(which I like ). The USPS lady just throw my parcel on the porch for everyone to see(not good I live in Chicago)
 
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